Marriage          Feb 26, 2017

Luke 16:18 “Everyone who divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery, and he who marries a woman divorced from her husband commits adultery.”   ESV

Today we will look at marriage.  But before we dig into this text let’s look at the bigger picture.

  1. In the Beginning
    1. Genesis 2:18-25 “Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for So out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would call them. And whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name. The man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him. So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh.  And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man.  Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.  And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.”  ESV
      1. God knew that men NEEDED a women
        1. We would not survive as a species
        2. We would not survive as people
        3. WE NEED OUR WIVES
      2. Man was formed from dirt
  • Woman was formed from Bone
    1. You decide which is stronger
  1. God said that the Man and Woman shall live together
    1. Note Man and Woman
    2. God designed marriage to be between a man and a woman.
  2. God united Adam and Eve in marriage LONG before there were any preachers, judges or ship captains available.
    1. The act of the two becoming one flesh WAS the union of marriage.
  3. Nakedness WITHOUT shame is reserved for a couple united in marriage
    1. NO ONE ELSE!
    2. That would be ADULTRY
      1. The physical act of adultery is SIN
      2. The cultivation of adultery is SIN
      3. Matthew 5:27-28 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”  ESV
    3. Marriage was always to be defined as a LIFETIME commitment
      1. Not for a set amount of time
      2. Not until it gets tough
      3. Not until you fall in lust with someone else
        1. LIFETIME
      4. What breaks the covenant bounds of marriage
          1. Romans 7:2-3 “Thus a married woman is bound by law to her husband while he lives, but if her husband dies she is released from the law of marriage. Accordingly, she will be called an adulteress if she lives with another man while her husband is alive. But if her husband dies, she is free from that law, and if she marries another man she is not an adulteress.” ESV
        1. Adultery
          1. They physical act
          2. The cultivation
  • The loving/lusting of anyone else EXCEPT GOD more than your spouse
  1. Addiction
    1. Same problem as adultery except instead of a person of the opposite sex your heart becomes devoted to a drug or alcohol.
    2. Family resources are stripped away in order to supply the desired FIX of the addict
  • If your lustful intent is directed at a thing or substance at the cost of your relationship with your wife or family the love covenant is broken
  1. Both adultery and addiction often fester into a third reason:
  2. Abuse
    1. We are commanded to love and submit one to another
      1. Abuse breaks the love covenant
      2. God does not expect you to be belittled, beaten or buried
        1. There is no love there
        2. Colossians 3:18-19 “Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.”   ESV
      3. All of these place the fleshly desires and pride of one person ahead of their spouse and their children
        1. Love NEVER demands its own way
        2. If supporting your habit for another person or substance leaves your family hungry and homeless YOU HAVE BROKEN YOUR MARRIAGE COVENANT
      4. What about getting remarried
        1. If your spouse dies you are free to be biblically remarried
        2. If your unbelieving spouse leaves you are free to be biblically remarried
        3. 1 Corinthians 7:12-16 “To the rest I say (I, not the Lord) that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him.  For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.  But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace.  Wife, how do you know whether you will save your husband? Husband, how do you know whether you will save your wife?”   ESV
        4. Note a time of serious repentance and dealing with God should be required to deal with any sin that may have occurred.
        1. Other than that, if your spouse is still breathing air you remain bound together.
        2. God’s Standards are higher than ours
      5. Is a divorce REQUIRED if adultery, addiction, abuse has occurred
        1. No
        2. But know it will take repentance to God, a new level of openness, a treatment program, or other corrective actions before the marriage may begin to become “normal”
          1. The reality is that FULL trust may never return
          2. Doubts and questions will remain
        3. There is much hard work to do
      6. Marriage is to be held in honor among all
        1. God will judge those who do not
      7. Marriage is supposed to be a human relationship that mirrors our relationship with God
        1. Love
        2. Grace
        3. Mercy
        4. Patience
        5. Permanence
        6. Helpful
        7. Protecting
        8. Nurturing
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